


Into Calm Waters

by inabsurd



Series: fluff bingo [1]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Canon Compliant, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Kissing, Pining, Romance, Yusuke's POV, this is largely unedited btw but I did try
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-08
Updated: 2020-03-08
Packaged: 2021-02-23 00:36:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23036320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inabsurd/pseuds/inabsurd
Summary: Yusuke you idiot you're in love
Relationships: Kitagawa Yusuke/Niijima Makoto
Series: fluff bingo [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1657969
Comments: 11
Kudos: 30
Collections: Writing Squad Fluff Bingo





	Into Calm Waters

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kiafeles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiafeles/gifts).



> My first fill for the writing servers fluff bingo requested by my friend Kiana!
> 
> Fun fact, the reason I ended up writing for this pairing is because I just put the main P5 characters into a randomizer and spun the wheel. I'm actually pretty pleased with the results?? I may just be ride or die for these two now
> 
> Also I was gonna change the summary because I wrote it as a placeholder for the draft but,, yeah now it's here forever

Living with Makoto is much simpler than he expected it to be. She’s neat, she’s organized, she’s financially savvy. In contrast, Yusuke thinks that living with him must be a nightmare. He cleans, but never consistently as his projects always make their way into the shared living space instead of remaining confined to his bedroom, and he almost never returns to their apartment with the same amount of cash as what he left with. The utilities are all under Makoto's name, and Yusuke can't help but worry that he's damaging her credit score with his inability to pay her on time.

He's quite frugal in his spending, of course, and he walks rather than taking the subway now that he no longer has a student pass, but that doesn't stop him from returning to the apartment with interesting pieces he's found in thrift stores or the occasional pet that absolutely violates the building's no pet policy.

How Makoto puts up with him, he'll never know.

Moving in together seemed like the natural progression of things after they graduated, what with the both of them choosing to remain within Tokyo for post-secondary studies. Makoto had been the one to suggest it, a three-inch binder in hand with budgeting on one page, and print-out ads of open rentals in the next.

"It's more cost-effective," she'd explained and Yusuke had agreed on the spot. It would have been crazy not to, what with the price of university tuition on top of the ridiculously overpriced and cramped dorms. He'd gotten a hefty scholarship, they both did, but who is Yusuke to argue with Makoto's three-inch binder?

He wonders, sometimes, if Makoto wishes she had roomed with Haru instead though. She's far neater than he is and Makoto could easily trust the Okumura Heiress to pay bills on time without a fuss. Already, Makoto's had to front some of the bills for him--not for long, but still. 

_ Makoto deserves better,  _ of this, Yusuke is certain. Silently, he resolves himself to walk with his head down from now on to avoid any unnecessary splurging.

* * *

They’re out with the old thieves--minus Haru who’s out of the country on business--the first time it happens. Futaba’s giving a very in-depth explanation on the process of creating her new app while Makoto looks to Yusuke in steadily growing horror as she tries her best to keep up with the younger girl’s lecture.

Ryuji and Ann laugh at her confusion while Ren offers her a confused smile, but Yusuke just feels warm. Out of their table of friends, she looks to him first for help. He can’t help but smile at that.

“Futaba, I don’t think we’re following anymore,” he tells her. It’s a pitiful rescue attempt, but he’s trying at least.

The hacker huffs, blowing her bangs from her eyes as she turns an annoyed glare to him, “C’mon, Inari, this is basic stuff. I mistyped one command and that stopped the app from launching entirely.  _ One command _ , Inari! That’s, like, one of the simplest fixes in the book!”

He stares at her blankly, eyes flicking to Makoto’s to see if she at least understood what that much meant.

She didn’t. The moment they make eye contact, they both burst into laughter.

Futaba’s head hits the table with a groan.

The artist is suddenly overcome by the urge to paint, to capture the sound of Makoto’s laugh, his feelings, their synchronization with bright colours and fluid brush strokes.

Across the table, Ren gives him a knowing look, much to the confusion of the artist.

* * *

Tonight is one of the rare nights they're both home. Makoto usually remains at her university library well into the night and, well, when Yusuke's not holed up in the art room, he likes to frequent Tokyo at odd hours just to see if he can spot the subject of his next painting. Ann still hasn't agreed to model for him, but she certainly doesn't reject him as quickly as she used to, which is a nice change of pace.

Although, that could be because he doesn't ask as often as he used to.

It's a quiet night for them, which happens even less frequently than them both being in the apartment at the same time. Usually, when they both have a night off, they get together with their other friends--mostly the old thieves, but a few others usually join them thanks to Ren's uncanny ability to become close with pretty much everyone he meets.

Yusuke loves his friends, he wouldn't trade in a minute with them for anything else, but he thinks that this is good too; the quiet times where Makoto lets herself actually relax and they can just enjoy each others' company. She's sitting in their small living room in an old t-shirt and Shuujin Academy embroidered shorts, an action movie playing from her phone screen, and a smile on her face.

Yusuke watches for a moment, just observing the way her eyes light up in joy whenever a particularly loud explosion echoes on the screen and finds a smile on his own face.

_ She's beautiful, _ he thinks.

He pauses, assessing the new thought. It's true, it's very obviously true actually, it's just not something he's really noticed before. Makoto was never the one he was closest with of their group--although he sometimes had a difficult time feeling close to any of them what with being one of two Phantom Thieves not to attend Shuujin--but that's changed since then. In the few months they've been living together, he's gotten to see a side to Makoto that none of their other friends do. They've never seen her dress for comfort alone, they've never come home to find her so engrossed in her studies that she forgot about the water she was boiling hours ago and let evaporate entirely. They've seen Makoto, they've known her as an honour student, as the teenager struggling with her morals and her place in the world, as Queen, their raging enemy analyst, but no one else has known her as a roommate. As someone to share a home with.

_ This, _ he realizes,  _ Is a private sight. A form of beauty unique to my eyes and mine alone. _

The urge to paint her is as sudden as a storm at sea; fierce, consuming-

Dangerous.

It doesn’t usually feel like this, the itch to grab his brushes. It’s sudden when he’s inspired, but there’s an undercurrent of trepidation he’s not used to feeling here. Like he’s afraid to paint her; like he’s afraid he’ll ruin the moment and scare her back into the proper honour student persona she hasn’t quite dismantled yet.

_ Just a sketch then,  _ he decides, turning, intent on grabbing his pencils.

Then he pauses.

Painting her is what  _ he _ wants. It's his urge, his desire, not Makoto's. 

And...he thinks he wants to do something for her instead. He wants her to feel this comfortable for as long as she can, all the time even, just so he can keep looking at her smile, at the stray hair that falls into her eyes because there's no headband to keep it in place.

He moves instead to the kitchen, a new plan swimming within his mind. He can paint her later--he really,  _ really _ hopes she'll give him the chance--but for now, he can think of one way he can make her evening a little better.

* * *

Yusuke finds himself outside of the living room again sometime later, hands full with the fruit of his labour; it's nothing special but he did make his own additions for more flavour.

He hopes Makoto will like it.

He clears his throat as he enters the living room, suspenseful music playing from Makoto’s little phone speaker at his approach.

_ How fitting,  _ he thinks with a wry smile.

"Are you hungry?" he passes a plate towards her, feeling shy and a little ridiculous for feeling shy at all. This is  _ Makoto _ , his fellow Phantom Thief, his roommate, his friend; it's crazy to feel so self-conscious over one offered meal.--especially when it’s not even the first time he’s cooked for her.

Makoto pauses her movie, eyes widening in surprise, “What’s all this?” she asks. She takes the plate with a grateful smile that sends Yusuke’s heart fluttering.

“Just some yakisoba,” he waves dismissively. He wishes they’d had more of a variety in their pantry, but it’s been a few years since Yusuke’s had anything else to work with consistently. At the very least, he’s become quite adept at spicing up convenience store dinners.

She laughs, bright and loud, “Yes, I can see that,” she teases, “I meant what’s the occasion?”

Yusuke takes a seat next to her on their couch, “I just wanted to say thank you,” he says honestly, “You put in so much effort into everything you do and I just thought you should know how grateful I am.”

Makoto's eyes flick downwards in an instant, a faint blush tinting her cheeks, "That’s not necessary, but you're welcome," she says, voice a little smaller than it was, body a little more drawn into itself.

"I've made you uncomfortable," he frowns.

Makoto is quick to butt in, "No, no, you didn't! Sorry. I just-" she takes a breath, "You're so sincere about everything. It's a very good thing," she takes his hand and gives it a brief, reassuring squeeze, "I'm just not prepared for it sometimes."

Yusuke stares at her for a moment, "I think all of our friends are sincere," he says, confusion clearly infused in his tone.

"We are," Makoto agrees, "It's hard to go through what we all did without learning to be completely honest with each other. You're just more...earnest, I guess," she smiles at him, relaxed once more, "I wish I had your confidence to speak my mind. And not just against injustice, but about my feelings as well."

Yusuke smiles at her as he takes another bite of their supper, "Being an artist forces you to face yourself and the world around you. My work would lose meaning if I wasn't completely honest with the canvas, and that just transfers over into my relationships as well."

"Maybe I should take up art," Makoto jokes, "I'm sure there'd be less miscommunication that way."

Yusuke snorts, “I think most would call that sort of bluntness a quirk.”

“Well I think it’s brave,” she says. A moment later, her eyes widen, caught off guard by her own words as much as Yusuke is.

“You pull off earnest just fine,” he smiles, “I don’t think you need to worry about taking up art to do so.”

Makoto’s head falls downwards, chin tucked shyly to her chest, “Yes, well, I still think you do it better,” she laughs, a little awkward, but not in a way that feels closed off.

He shakes his head, “Your way is beautiful,” he tells her, “I doubt I could ever tire of these conversations with you.”

“I might,” she teases, “You keep...catching me off guard. I don’t think I’ll ever quite be prepared for what you’ll say.”

Yusuke takes in his roommate’s shy smile, the way their legs brush ever so slightly against each other’s on the couch, “I hope not. I think I’d like to keep surprising you.”

He means it too. The subtle way Makoto had lit up at the meal he prepared alone is more than enough motivation to do so again. Small things, big things, anything to make her smile when she least expects it.

“You just like having the advantage,” Makoto’s eyes tilt up in amusement and Yusuke wonders if she’s remembering sneaking up on shadows too or if there’s some other thought in her mind that’s making her grin at him like that.

He shifts away for the first time during their conversation, nervous all of a sudden, “It certainly doesn’t hurt,” he agrees. If she keeps having this effect on him, he’ll need every advantage he can get.

Makoto’s eyes follow his slight retreat but she doesn’t comment on it. Instead, she maneuvers her chopsticks to her meal.  _ Her first bite,  _ Yusuke realizes, body tense with anticipation.

The moment the yakisoba reaches her lips, she sputters, a surprised laugh escaping her mouth, “What’s  _ in  _ this?”

“Is it bad?” Yusuke’s heart sinks a little.

She shakes her head and goes for a second bite, “Not bad,” she corrects, “Just...unexpected.”

The artist’s hands twitch, itching for the feel of a paintbrush.

_ Oh,  _ his heart races,  _ I think I know what Ren’s look was about. _

Yusuke swallows nervously,  _ Huh. _

* * *

That evening, the artist finds himself texting their old leader. Ren had always been the one he’d gone to for advice, and even now that the Phantom Thieves have disbanded, Yusuke still seeks out his help first and foremost.

**Yusuke:** _ I have a problem _

**Yusuke:** _ I seem to have fallen for Makoto _

**Yusuke:** _ I want to tell her how I feel but I'm uncertain how to do so _

**Ren:** _ Just be honest with her _

**Yusuke:** _ Honesty is not the issue _

**Yusuke:** _ What matters is how I tell her _

**Yusuke:** _ Should I invite her out? Or would that pressure her? _

**Yusuke:** _ Funds are also an issue as my bank account is a little low _

**Ren:** _ Don’t overthink it _

**Ren:** _ Just jump into it, headlong _

* * *

The apartment Yusuke and Makoto share is small and hard to pace in due to the amount of furniture and supplies they had to cram into such a small space. He knows this because in the past half-hour, he’s stubbed his toe on their end table a total of four times. Every time it happens he tells himself to change course and then, almost immediately after, he forgets, mind preoccupied by Makoto and his conversation with Ren to bother.

How their ex-leader manages to see straight into the heart of an issue every single time, Yusuke will never know. During that first year Yusuke knew him, the boy pulled the same feat over and over again. It seems that, even though they’ve lost the ability to enter the metaverse, Ren hasn’t lost his ability to help others face and grow from their problems.

And when Ren speaks, he’s almost always right.

Unfortunately, what he says is almost never easy either.

So Yusuke paces, trying his best to keep his mind off of his roommate and the conversation he wants to have with her tonight. He’d paint if he had the time just to try and calm his nerves, but he’d asked Makoto to come home early tonight and he knows that if she stays on time--and she usually does--she’ll be walking through those doors any minute now.

The door handle rattles, the tell-tale sound of the lock turning pulls Yusuke from his thoughts once more.

Pain lances up his foot in the same moment, foot colliding for the fifth time with their end table.

“Are you okay?” Makoto asks, dropping her bag on their floor as she reaches the artist’s side.

Yusuke smiles, teeth gritted tightly behind closed lips, “I’m fine,” he tells her, silently berating himself for the mistake.

Makoto smiles at him, all concern and sly amusement, and, suddenly, Yusuke doesn’t regret stubbing his toe nearly as much as he did; especially when she wraps an arm around his middle and jokingly leads him to the couch like he can’t walk on his own.

“Put your foot up, she instructs, moving their throw blanket to the floor as a make-shift footrest, “We wouldn’t want the swelling to get worse.”

He laughs but complies, happy to play along for the moment, “Have you been taking lessons from Takemi-san?”

“Definitely,” Makoto agrees in mock-seriousness, “Thanks to Ren’s work with her, she’s been very helpful.”

Yusuke nods, relaxing into the seat as he looks down to Makoto, seated cross-legged on their living room floor. She leans forward, comfortable in their shared space as she looks up at him, “So what did you want to talk about?” she asks.

“Right,” Yusuke swallows, mouth suddenly dry, “That,” he’s not quite sure how to start, not sure what words to use.

_ Don’t overthink it,  _ he reminds himself. He looks at her, at her content smile, at the way her eyes track his slight movement at her question,  _ Into the depths, no hesitation. _

“I admire you a lot, Makoto,” he starts, “I have for a long time, but I’ve noticed it more now that we live together.”

She smiles a little tightly, but it’s still genuine, “Thank you. You’re quite admirable yourself.”

For a moment, Yusuke’s brain blips out. He feels warmth radiating within him, heady and comforting. She admires  _ him _ . He fights back a blush.

“It’s more than just admiration,” he takes a deep breath, ready to take the step off the dock and into the icy, unknowable ocean that is his roommate, “I care about you. I care about all of our friends, but it’s different with you.” 

Makoto’s brow furrows, “Different?” her eyes, the way she’s looking at him, Yusuke can tell she’s on the verge of realization; it’s the same look she gets when a concept finally clicks in her studies.

“I care about you as more than a friend,” he blurts out, wanting to get the truth out before she realizes on her own. It would feel too much like surrender if he just allowed her to figure it out without actually hearing it, and Makoto deserves his honesty at the very least.

Her eyes widen, surprise colouring her cheeks a dusty pink.

Yusuke smiles at her, feeling exposed in the same way as when he paints. When he has to bear his soul to himself, his material, and then later the viewer in order to create something beautiful, “I wanted you to know,” he tells her. In all honesty, the artist is having a hard time beating down any expectations about this situation. The most important part of the confession is over, he’s said his piece, but he can’t help but hope that Makoto feels the same.

The honour student sits in silence, the cogs turning diligently in her mind. Yusuke waits with bated breath, afraid of what her response will be because, no matter what, their relationship is going to change. Yusuke just hopes it changes for the better, whether she reciprocates his feelings or not.

“You,” Makoto begins, an intense look in her eyes as she rises to her feet, “Are one of the most ridiculous people I’ve ever met,” across her face, the storm breaks, revealing a fond, if slightly frustrated, smile. She steps closer, nearly looming over Yusuke as she invades his space and, for a terrifying minute, the artist is certain she’s going to go full-metaverse mode and attack before she invades his space even further and presses her lips to his.

People always talk about kissing being this electric feeling, that the heat and static remind them that they’re alive. For Yusuke, it feels more like sinking into calm waters. He knows he can come back up for air whenever, but he’s content for the moment to just allow the ocean to take him where it may.

Makoto pulls away first, washing Yusuke up on sun-bathed shores.

“I care about you too,” her lips turn upwards with a wicked smirk, and all he can think is,  _ So there’s the electricity. _

Yusuke’s hands twitch, but not for a paintbrush. This time, the itch is to hold her, pull his beautiful, powerful roommate close and never let her go. To look into her abyss and sink into it willingly.

He grabs her around her middle and does just that, pulling her down onto the couch where he can press as close to her as he wants and feel the turbulent waves recede.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Kudos and comments would be greatly appreciated;; rare pair hell is gonna be rough


End file.
